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WTF: A Poem


I’ll cut to the chase: This is a depressing poem.

However, that’s not the major reason why I fancy it. The overwhelming feels that this masterpiece emit is a just a strike. A bonus point, I must say. But what caught my heart is the nakedness of its connection to reality. Every point, illustration and inference included between the lines are all terrifyingly true to what we call life. More specifically, the system or cycle of life.

Rainbow Rowell once wrote that art wasn’t supposed to look nice. It was supposed to make you feel something. I think poetry does that just fine.

So it’s safe to say that poems are works of art, right?

But this, this doesn’t just make you feel something. It makes you want to do something; rip the system and burn down paper infrastructures in this freaking paper town.

So yeah, that is how I express my love for this poem.

Without further ado, here’s the poem.

A PIECE OF ADVICE: DON’T BYPASS ANY PHRASE TO FEEL THE FULL EFFECT

I Choose To Be Truly Human


I sat perplexed as I try to adjoin the words coming out of the teacher’s mouth in order to get a sum of sense from the content of the lecture. A series of ‘what ifs,’ ‘buts’ and ‘maybes’ float around my head which were never realized due to the unrelenting doubt I possess with regards to my comprehension ability. Remembering the quiz regarding the day’s topic expected next meeting, I narrowed my eyes and puckered my brows at my pen. It was a battle with my grade as a price; and at that moment, I knew I lost. With no other choice left, I began to inscribe the transcript of the teacher’s speech on my notebook. Drowning at the sea of words being thrown at mid-air, I surrendered the purpose of learning and just continued to gather and weave letters into a bundle of mess for me to retain.

The teacher arrives. The teacher speaks. The teacher leaves. This is the unfaltering routine I have witnessed for seventeen years—an education of using one-way communication with students perfecting the role of being mere receivers.  For the sake of achieving high grades, I accepted it and even adapted to it. I am a product of oppression; taught to passively receive what was said, memorize what I write and repeat the existing knowledge. I was oblivious that I was being deprived of a clearer perspective on my own reality and engagement to the world; and restrained from flourishing to my fullest potential. I was unaware that little by little, I was processed to be dehumanized.

I was scared. I feared deviation thus I went through with the norm of how formal education is implemented. This instance has led me to behave and think accordingly; a subtle similarity of that of a puppet whose actions are dictated by the one in authority. The only difference is how it doesn’t possess a working mind that is made dysfunctional by the system. According to Feire, “By requiring a man to behave mechanically, mass production domesticates him. By separating his activity from the total project, requiring no total critical attitude toward production, it dehumanizes him. By excessively narrowing a man’s specialization, it constricts his horizons, making of him a passive, fearful, naïve being.”

Removing the freedom of a person to think critically is just the same as extracting his soul, his inner being. We become robots; merely pawns of those with great power to do this and that. In the end, we systematically go through the sequential education with no breakthrough for the reason that we use the same methods and focus on the same goals set by society. But we are not robots. Our motivation should not come beyond our own self. We should be taking control of our lives, becoming autonomous; mastering our craft, enjoying its “flow;” and gearing towards helping everyone work, making them a part of a higher purpose. This is the trend standing out above the lengthy educational timeline of mine; which is also the most important and crucial of all. The motivation should not be extrinsic by getting something from others in doing it.  It should be intrinsic, by getting something from ourselves in doing it (Pink, 2009). Doing is how “we organize,” “how we think,” and “how we do.”

I know there are a lot of anomalies in every aspect that comprises education—from lousy unprofessional teachers to neglected school facilities. However, these are common realities of every school and department which point to the usual cause—lack of funds. Now, what’s more crucial for me is the system itself resulting to absence or lack of critical perception of students; because this may or may not be caused by the lack of money but the lack of a flexible and conscious spirit.

The body of knowledge is evolving and ever-changing. It does not merely exist as what it is. It conforms. It incorporates. And, I believe, this can only be achieved through dialogue—a teacher learning from the students, the students learning from the teacher. One thing that I learned is to never stop wondering, to never stop questioning. That’s where critical consciousness is born and can be found.

We should wake up and arise from being a slave of the systematic thought. We should start to think and act like human, which we already are. To end, “We needed an education which would lead men to take a new stance toward their problems, one oriented toward research instead of repeating irrelevant principles. An education of “I wonder,” instead of merely, “I do.” (Freire, 1973)

The Inequitable Supremacy


Student activists in the main have always believed in the line, “Education is a right, not a privilege.” Being exposed to the unfiltered mass media as a former Journalism student, I know for a fact that this line has always been bellowed in rallies since time immemorial; a line that indicates how crooked our educational system is, a line that still infiltrates and burns within my heart.

At the present time, you don’t have to hear various students utter these words of anguish anymore; not for the grounds that an improvement occurred in our educational system, but because it is not necessary for it to be verbalized for us to know that the problem behind it still exists. You can easily see it in the eyes of those who are struggling to read and write even without electricity, the eyes of those who have nothing to eat in school, the eyes of those who dream to graduate as they sell bread or collect junk to earn money for school expenses. These are the stories told by the eyes of the deprived—the eyes of the victims of selective education.

Everyone has experienced selective education at some point in time. From the provinces to the cities, no one is exempted. Usually, it can be observed in admission tests to schools which offer quality education. But is that all there is to it? Contrary to popular belief, selective education is including but not limited to measuring one’s intelligence quotient. Education, for me, is selective when it becomes a privilege. That is, when education becomes inaccessible due to poverty, poor academic performance, physical or mental disabilities, and community civilization, among others.

Philippine Agenda’s documentary film entitled, “Edukasyon” portrayed this in accordance with our deteriorating educational system in both the rural and urban setting. Clearly, it served as either an eye-opener to some or a reminder for those who have already neglected the problem. For me, it was the latter. Watching the documentary is a nudge to my sleeping consciousness and a poke to my nationalistic heart. It made me question everything in a critical view and look beyond the lenses of what the documentary has focused on as a reason for selective education; which is corruption.

Jessica Soho, the host of the film, opened with a reminder of the approaching 2010 elections and ended with a prompt to wisely choose whom to put in authority; which made the viewers focus the blame of selective education on the government alone. Looking at the surface level, corruption really does has a big say in providing a public formal education, especially in the rural areas, because the bureau holds the key to our resources. This is somehow true as it is stated in Article XIV, Section 4, Paragraph (5) that the State shall assign the highest budgetary priority to education. But seeing our present situation, it seemed otherwise.

For me, it all boils down to poverty. Various scenes in the film have depicted how poverty hinders one from going to school; in more detail, how a child can’t go to school because he or she has no baon. It’s easy to see how poverty causes malnutrition and how malnutrition leads to selective education. Now, should we put the blame on the authorities for this? No. Food provision is not the responsibility of the education bureaucracy. It is the responsibility of the parents. Looking closely at the film, I keep on wondering why the parents let their children work to earn money when it is their job to do so. More often than not, this leads to the child performing poorly in class.

As a public elementary school graduate, I know the perks of being included in the star section and how it significantly affects your condition in school. From the best classrooms to the more competent teachers, the higher sections get it all; leaving the residue (i.e. cracked black boards, dilapidated classrooms) to the lower sections. What the documentary has failed to point out is how other factors like academic performance contribute to the allocation of these resources, resulting to selective education. Mind you, this is just elementary level. Selective education in terms of academic performance is more apparent in high school because this is the level wherein higher authorities recognize the performance of the students by engaging in interschool competitions. Since the star students represent their school, the school will therefore “take care” of these students.

Long ago, I thought the crises of education both in the urban and rural areas were merely sensationalized by media. This came to a halt when I had my firsthand experience in a public school in the city; and a direct understanding of the culture in the provinces. When I stayed in the Cordilleras for almost a year, I became aware of the indigenous cultural communities and the thin line that separates cultural preservation and economic development. For one, some communities see the continuum of oral tradition and weaving as the standard education. With this, I came to question myself if it would be possible to preserve the culture of indigenous peoples and at the same time giving them access to formal education. Sure, the government has “promised” them educational provisions and alternative learning programs that integrate their culture with education as stated in R.A. 8371, more commonly known as the IPRA 1997, which declares in Section 28 that the State shall, through the NCIP, provide a complete, adequate and integrated system of education, relevant to the needs of the children and young people of ICCs/IPs and in Section 30 that the State shall provide equal access to various cultural opportunities to the ICCs/IPs through the educational system, public or private cultural entities, scholarships, grants and other incentives. But where is the proof of its implementation in action? Be that as it may, one thing is for sure, an individual should not be deprived of the kind of education he or she is asking for.

There is no denying that selective education has become a norm in society; as most people believe that quality education is only for those who either is a genius or can actually afford it. Kaya kapag mahirap ka at hindi ka matalino, pasensya ka. But why do we have to pay for education in the first place? And so what if you’re not an UPCAT qualifier? It is your right to have access to the quality education of your choice whether formal or alternative.

Education is not just the responsibility of the administration. It is ours too by dutifully fulfilling our roles in society; may it be as a parent, a teacher and a student among others. Eradicating selectivity can only be achieved if all Filipinos help hand in hand in filling the gaps and erasing the anomalies of education. It may be hard and tedious; but as long as we have time, perseverance and guidance from God, we have everything.

May this serve as a challenge and an inspiration for change and excellent progress to serve our beloved country and fellowmen.

What You See Is Not Always What You Get


As I leisurely walk along a seemingly empty park, I hear the subtle whisper of the cool breeze as it blows my hair and passes through the row of trees, making their branches sway delicately. I hear the crisp sound of leaves and the crunch of gravel as the wheels of the jeepneys roll over the asphalt, the slow rumble of engine in sync with nature. This is probably one of the most relaxing experiences I’ve had. The beauty of nature has me utterly distracted from my unending list of predicaments. I have nothing in mind. Hence, no stress!
I took a deep breath as my lips curl into a smile. At that moment, I have uncovered how freedom felt mentally and physically. As I look around, I realized that the sun has decided to come out and make the weather even more humid. Nevertheless, I continued my stroll. Perspiration has finally conquered my entire skin. With the sun still burning, I tried wiping my arms. I squint as the playful rays of sunlight catches my eye; when all of a sudden, it was gone. As I look up, I see the magnificent sculpture above me—the Oblation.
Right there and then, everything came rushing back to me: The application forms, the degree programs, my grades, the upcoming exams and interviews, the battle in who gets the slots. Generally speaking, the requirements I need to accomplish for transfer. I am not here to have a vacation and appreciate the scenery. I am not here to have fun.

I AM HERE FOR A REASON

As many people know, University of the Philippines has always been my dream school. As I child, I used to go there all the time for a visit. But even when I’m already inside the campus, riding the ikot and going inside buildings, I’m still an outsider. I can only admire the beauty of UP from afar. Practicing what UP students experience and do is not good enough for me.
I wanted to know what it is like inside. I wanted to be called an “Iskolar ng bayan,” a legitimate UP student. Perhaps, that was the reason why I was given that one-time opportunity to see and experience for myself what it is like to study in the most prestigious University in the Phlippines; I wanted it way too much.
But mind you, what I saw inside was nothing alike from what I knew and saw from the outside.
Everything is ugly up close.
(To be continued…)
20150616 | 11:11 PM

I Choose To Live


I felt the agitation flowing through my veins as the tension arose and burned in the soggy air. Butterflies filled my twisting belly as my mind heaved in anticipation. It was overwhelming.  I sensed the apprehension of other wide-eyed high school students who were struggling for the same dream that I desire. It was palpable. That Sunday afternoon, marks the most significant time when we were all hurling ourselves against the arduous barricade guarding our entrance to the premier university in the Philippines—theUPCAT.

We all long for a better future, we all dream for a better life. To put it simply, every single one of us during that time was a mere traveller. All of us are taking up the same journey, aiming for the same destination. Like all travellers, we encompassed different preparations that all gave birth to various outcomes. Some of us were armed to the teeth with weapons of stock knowledge while some come with wisdom tucked under their belts. Regardless of the firepower we used as a form of attack, no one is rest assured that he or she will reach the destination pursued.

Getting through the prominent door of UP that thousands of Filipinos are vying to enter was my ultimate dream once I started having a conscious mind of that of someone who is intellectually ready, aware and concerned of what the future may bring. I told myself that once I enter UP, my life will be settled and I will not ask for more. I proved myself wrong. Now that I have reached the destination while currently living in it, I realized that it is not enough. It will never be enough. One dream will just lead to another with the latter being bigger and brighter than the former.

Some elderly people might say that by this time, surely I should be able to see a clearer and more concrete picture of my future. But that’s the thing. One cannot say that he or she is closer to the future because the future has no end at all. It has no limit. Therefore, it cannot be finalized. It can take you wandering endlessly on a heap of possibilities and norms the society has established, keeping you relentlessly striving in a sea filled with various opportunities based primarily on the future.

Life has become the future. Every moment of our lives is lived for the future. From the moment we were born, we were trained and honed to live for it. The first formal step our feet dared to delve onto without further ado is studying. From there, a dream to graduate is constructed in order to have a job to support the family you dream to build. Primarily, to be able to send your kids in school and repeat the same things you did growing up. Life has become a cycle for the future; A pattern in which we cannot escape from.

I do believe in school and jobs. I believe in the future. Why would I write this required paper to earn a grade if I do not value and uphold my future? The thing is, I have had enough of living my life for the future. All my life, I have been constantly dreaming, lost in the sea of investing for the impending events that I forgot to wake up. I realized that I was too busy dreaming to actually wake up, value life for what it is and live.

I do not intend to escape from the standard the society has provided. But I am sure as hell that I do not want to pursue a dream just because the society has agreed upon it. It is like living up to someone else’s expectations. I do not want to be like one of those paper people living in this world; burning the future to stay warm. I dream to live life for what it is, value the abstract and not the paper ones for those are the things that matter. And I do; because right now?
I choose to live.